Do Your Young Athletes Focus Too Much on Mistakes?
Do they criticize their performance instead of focusing on learning from their mistakes?
And do they ignore what they did well?
If so, your sports kids are likely perfectionists. They tend to be hard on themselves after they compete, which undermines their confidence.
Perfectionists focus on mistakes and bad plays. They concentrate on what they should have done better.
You want your kids to grow their confidence, instead of hurting it with critical behavior after they compete. They need to stop judging their performance negatively and focus instead on how they can improve.
It’s common for young athletes to evaluate their performance in a negative way instead of a way that’s helpful…
One of the top challenges for perfectionists is that they have high expectations and are very hard on themselves after competing. They only focus on what they have done wrong.
They critique their performance and take these negative thoughts home with them, sometimes thinking about their goofs for hours or all night.
Help your athletes combat perfectionism after a game. Ask them to think of two things they did well, strategically, mentally or physically.
Next, you want them to also think about two things they’d like to improve in the next competition. There is a big difference between criticism and learning to improve after games…
By focusing on how they can improve, they’re adopting a “growth” approach to competing. Instead of telling themselves that they’re terrible andshould quit, you want them to think about ways they can learn and grow.
Keep in mind that they should complete this exercise in about a half hour. Then it’s time to move on–to school, homework, or other activities. You want them to focus on other roles
If you can help your young athletes adopt a growth mindset, you’ll be doing them a big favor…
Instead of dwelling on mistakes and telling themselves they’ll never get better, they’ll discover how to make the most of their mistakes, learn, and grow.
Related Articles on Youth Sports:
- Helping Perfectionists Overcome Fragile Confidence
- How One Coach Helped a Perfectionist Athlete
- The Expectations Trap for Perfectionists
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The Composed Sports Kid
“The Composed Sports Kid” audio and workbook digital download program for young athletes and their parents or coach helps kids cope with frustration and anger in sports. Help your sports kids learn how to manage expectations and let go of mistakes so they can keep their head in the game.
The Composed Sports Kid system is really two programs in one–one program to train parents and coaches how to help their kids practice composure, and one program that teaches young athletes–ages 6 to 13–how to improve composure, let go of mistakes quickly, have more self-acceptance, and thus enjoy sports more!