Help Young Athletes Develop A Pregame Routine
Just before a game, a number of challenges hurt kids’ confidence. A big one among them, parents tell us, are worries about who will come to kids’ games to watch them perform.
Young athletes worry about coaches, friends, girlfriends and boyfriends, parents, and parents’ friends watching them and possibly seeing them mess up.
These thoughts take kids’ minds out of sports and focus them instead on social approval. They want to be liked, of course. They think that in order to be liked, they have to perform really well.
From a performance and mental game perspective, this is a double-whammy.
First, kids are distracted by these worries when they perform and can’t focus on what they need to do to perform well in sports.
Second, they feel pressure to perform well. This often leads to kids raising their expectations or trying to perform perfectly.
When they do mess up, they feel frustrated when they can’t meet these expectations.
The result: They don’t perform well.
If your kids seek social approval or worry about others’ watching them—and let’s face it, most kids do—you can help them understand why it hurts their performance before and during a game.
In fact, you can give them a few tips for dealing with social approval in ways that improve their focus and confidence before a game.
First of all, help them identify their worries about what people will think of their performance. See if they can clearly say whose presence at a game makes them worry the most. Coaches? Friends? Parents?
Second, help them understand that people will like or admire them for who they are—not for how they perform. Remind them that you love them no matter how they perform.
Third, remind them to stop mind reading into what others’ might be thinking as this is irrational. Your athletes need to focus on the process of playing and ignore who might be in the stands.
Before a game, kids should enter the role of athletes and clear their minds of thoughts about what people think or who’s at the game.
They should have a pregame routine that helps them concentrate on the tasks of being an athlete—not on worrying about what others will think of them.
They might visualize performing well, or listen to music that makes them feel good, or stretch and focus on their strategy for the game.
We really appreciate all the feedback you’re giving us about what busts kids’ confidence before games or performances.
If you’ve haven’t taken our survey yet, please do; your feedback is critical to us as we prepare resources that help you be the best sports parents possible.
Take the survey here: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/pregame
Related Articles on Kids’ Mental Game:
- Helping Young Athletes Be Team Players
- How Playing Sports Can Help Kids Transition to Reopening
- The Importance of Playfulness and Trust in Youth Sports
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