Helping Young Athletes Kick Perfectionism
Lisa Cohn here from the Ultimate Sports Parent.
In my last post, I talked about all the great questions and comments we have received from parents and coaches about perfectionism and fear of failure.
One of the biggest concerns from parents is that it may be too late.
Some parents have said that the damage is already been done and it may be too late to “save” their kids from the perils of perfectionism and fear of failure.
Here’s how one golf parent put it:
“I’m afraid in my case the damage has already been done. My son is now 16 and has played competitive golf for about 6 years. This past year he practiced constantly, but by August he just started to post high numbers and lose confidence.”
This sports parent confessed that she was part of the problem and it may be too late to help., It is true, that when we’re talking about young athletes’ fear of making mistakes, parents are very much a part of the problem:
“I know I probably put too much pressure on him. After a difficult tournament in early September, he put his clubs down, and hasn’t picked them up since… I feel that his perfectionist ways and being so hard on himself is part of it, but I think I’m also a big part in why he has quit golf almost entirely. It may be too late to change anything…”
My brother, Dr. Patrick J. Cohn, said it’s never too late to improve your young athletes’ mental game, especially if they continue to participate in sports.
Often, kids are perfectionists in other areas of their lives, and learning how to cope with this trait in sports can help them in school and other areas of their lives.
Once your sports kids get a better handle on fear of failure and perfectionism in sports, you’ll find that they will feel freer to be creative in school and extra-curricular activities. They’ll spend less time avoiding mistakes in general!
My brother gave me permission to leak a few details of the new program we are launching this Friday, Feb. 8 at 9 a.m. Eastern Time.
Patrick and I are frantically putting the finishing touches on our new program:
Sports Parents’ Top Dilemma: Helping Young Athletes Kick Perfectionism and Fear of Failure.
We’ll be offering a one-two punch for knocking out fear of failure in young athletes!
See, both you as a parent or coach must “team up” with your athletes to benefit the most. For this reason, we have developed two parts to the program:
1. A downloadable e-book that identifies the challenge, explains why it is harmful to young athletes (but also very common), and gives in-depth, step-by-step “sports psychology” tips for helping kids.
2. A 20-plus page downloadable workbook for young athletes intended to help your kids identify beliefs and expectations that are at the root of perfectionism. The workbook will help sports kids develop strategies that allow them to play more freely with less fear in competition.
Related Articles on Youth Sports:
- Create a Sports Culture that Includes All Kids
- Motivates Kids to Play Sports and Stay Active
- The Benefits of a Growth Mindset in Youth Sports
*Subscribe to The Sports Psychology Podcast on iTunes
*Subscribe to The Sports Psychology Podcast on Spotify
Help Young Athletes Boost Confidence in Sports!
Every day, we receive letters from parents like you who want their children and teens to excel in sports. However, these parents can see fear, doubt, and frustration on the faces of their kids who struggle with the “inner” game of sports. But these parents have no idea how to help their kids overcome the worries, expectations and self-defeating thoughts that prevent their young athletes from feeling confident and successful.
You can benefit from our 15-plus years’ of work in sports psychology and sports parenting research. Now, you can tap into our secrets to sports success through a cutting-edge, 14-day program that helps young athletes overcome the top “mental game” challenges that sports parents face—and the top challenges young athletes face.